Thursday, August 11, 2011

But Mom, All the Cool Kids are Twating.....

I love my friends. They are funny. They give me hilarious stuff to post about, they (sometimes) keep me in line, and they (usually) don't take any of my shit seriously. Did I mention I have like three friends. I know it's tragic! Something about being abrasive and too forthwith.... but I think those are my star qualities!

Anyway I was emailing my friend about my blog, and because I've decided I'm a super serious blogger now (with my following of 4, thank you), that I should also get a twitter. I kid you not, this is her response. I may have edited it, slightly.

(no subject)
7 messages
SB Wed, Aug 10, 2011 at 5:37 PM

So this is what I was going to write you earlier but couldn't over work e mail. [because that's how we roll]

It recently came to my attention that [you] is [I could have changed this to are, but the idea of her possibly saying this how it was written is just to funny] on Twitter. And by came to my attention I mean [you] e mailed me to say

"I'm thinking about joining Twitter."

and when I wrote back "NOOO!!!"

[your] response was

"Too late."

(Rude? YES!) [umm hello, do you not know me]

It's so trendy, it's so mindless, it's so not us. [hey I can be hip and trendy when I want to, I swear I don't live under a rock] This has literally kept me up at night. [What, little old me] OK more like I was up worrying about other BS and then I suddenly remember, OH Shit B's on fucking Twitter. [That's right bitches, run and hide. Snark you --> another phrase added to the lexicon. It's like a less intense fuck you. And yes, I am going to make this happen]

So last night, when tossing and turning it suddenly came to me, it's OK that B is on Twitter,because it gives me freedom to say twat all I want. [I live to serve]


"hey check out B on Twitter, last night she twatted the funniest thing."
"B's on Twitter twatting away as we speak."
"Did you catch that twat B had yesterday?"

So as long as you don't twat about your twat, I've decided to be ok with it [gee thanks, but it's not that kind of twitter account, or blog... but it could be....or not *shudder*]
I may have laughed on and off for 20 minutes about how many times she used the word twat (which she stole from me, RUDE) in her email. I may secretly love this shit. (Shhh... don't tell). I also really like Twitter. It may not give me the forum to get on my soap box, but I can be a little mouthy anyway. 140 characters to express a mood, a statement, a whatever, well that's like brilliant bob damn Hemingway shit. And I love me some Hemingway.

So I say if you're all jumping off the bridge I'm going too! What have you done that was so trendy and hip you're embarrassed to talk about it. C'mon, I promise not to point and laugh, just the laughing... only. We're all friends here, share.